September 5, 2011
Do you ever feel like running away? Not just away from home, but away from everything? Away from life? Sometimes I want to run, fast, in no particular direction. Run so far that soon I’m in another state. I want to feel the burn in my chest and the weight lifted off my shoulders and see my life left in the dust. I want to start over. Every decision and mistake would become a thing of the past and I could be whoever, wherever… Run away with me?
August 7, 2011
One day, our paths will cross. I will smile politely and you’ll look nervous but secretly, I’ll think it’s cute. We’ll talk for a while about our family, the weather, and our jobs. We’ll eat crappy food and tell stories from our past. You’ll show me your flaws one by one, hoping I don’t run away. The layers will unravel and I’ll start to love you. You’ll learn everything about me and I’ll worry I’m not good enough. We’ll stay up late kissing and laughing and wondering how we ever lived without each other. You’ll become a part of my life and I’ll become a part of yours. Maybe you’ll stay, maybe you won’t. But at night I lay in bed and think about how excited I am to meet you.
August 6, 2011
I’ve always been the girl that hangs out with the guys. The one that can make jokes and play video games and listen to non-stop conversations about cars and women. I’m okay with being that girl. But I also miss the comfort of having a best friend - a girl that knows me better than I know myself. A girl that is there for me when I’m crying, who will go shopping with me, and who will spend all day watching sappy love movies with me just because I feel like it. Having guys as friends is nice, do not get me wrong. There is always less drama, and they never judge me for the way I look or what I say. But sometimes, a girl needs a girlfriend.
July 31, 2011
If you’re having a bad day - put your fingers on your wrist. Do you feel that? That’s your pulse. That’s how people know you’re alive. Tomorrow, that pulse might not be there. Or the next day. Or the day after that. In this moment, you are alive. Your heart is beating. And while at times, you may feel like you wish it weren’t - this life is worth living. Someone out there loves you. If that’s not enough to live for, I don’t know what is.
July 30, 2011
Depression will not get the best of me. Anxiety will not control my life. Sadness is not who I am. I am more than what the doctors define me. I deserve to be happy and to lead a normal life. I deserve to not be judged or looked down on because of how I’ve been diagnosed. I am a beating heart and bones covered with skin - just like you, and you, and you. You will not get the best of me. You will not control my life. You do not know who I am.
July 29, 2011
I love the rise and fall of words. The highs and the lows combined with the dips and soft sounds. Words are there for you when people aren’t. They are there for reassurance, for comfort, for strength. But they can also hurt. Words have the power to change lives; to shape someone’s entire being. Words are not to be treated carelessly. Use them wisely.
July 28, 2011
I don’t know when we stopped being us. The fire is gone; the flame has been burned out. I miss the you I once knew. I miss the compliments, the spontaneity, and the simple reminders that you think I’m beautiful. Where did it all go? Why is it like this? I know you think I’ll be around forever so you don’t have to try, but sometimes, I wish you would still fight for me.
July 27, 2011
Tired thoughts and tired eyes; tired hands and tired hearts. Words that have lost their meaning and relationships that have lost their substance. We’re young and we’re scared. The future seems distant, but we know it’s fast approaching. We’re scared our dreams won’t come true. We’re scared we’ll run out of time.
July 26, 2011
The world is waiting at my feet. I can feel it in every step I take. So close, yet so far. Every decision and every memory sends a ripple through the water; a fleeting fragment of movement in a place that remains still. I am yearning for more. More than this mundane routine and the same familiar places. There are so many things I have yet to see. I know the world is waiting - the tricky part is figuring out where to begin.
July 25, 2011
I lose myself in the crevices of your body and the lines on your face. I am whole. I am here. I am me. I have wrapped my heart and hands around yours hoping you don’t slip away. I fear that if I lost you, I would lose me, too.
